Kvetch Haven
Before more people misunderstood "KVETCH" as a person name, perhaps I should explain the meaning a little.
Kvetch actaully meant to complain and whine. This blog named "Kvetch Haven" so that I can complain a little, whine a little about life. Of course, this blog will not be solely on constant whinning and complain.
Open-mindedness VS Moral Values
whispered @ Sunday, October 30, 2005 by stardusz
"Hey, I thought you are an open-minded person, what's so wrong with having sex with my ex then?" someone once said this to me.
Well, nothing is wrong with having sex with your ex-partner as long as both of you enjoyed it and in my point of view, both got to be single; no partner at the moment.
I am never against anyone having sex with his/ her ex-partner. But not when this person's ex-partner has a partner currently and/or you yourself have a partner already, then this is where, in my opinion, moral values has a conflict. Open-mind about having sex with someone is no long the key point, moral values is on the screen instead.
Just imagine, how would you feel if your partner has been going back to his/ her ex partner for regular sex activities. How would you feel? Feeling nothing? Don't lie to yourself. I bet there will be a mixture of some reactions I can imagine, either all surged in together or one comes after another or just one of the following feeling comes to you:
1. Anger
2. Betrayal
3. Lost of trust
4. Lost of self-esteem, confidence
5. Ego/ Pride hurt
6. Anguish
7. Hurt emotionally
8. (the list might go on... ...)
Peronally, I won't agree to having sex with my ex-partner when I know that he has a girlfriend already. I just placed myself in her situation and imagine how hurt I would be if I was her. I'll be having sex with my partner only and not with anyone else. To me, having sex with someone who is attached does not shows that you are open-minded person. In contrary, it goes to shows how immature and inconsiderate both parties are. And, yes, bad karma, if you believes in it. (Well, I believe... What goes around, comes around.. I'll be punished in a similar way)
To think of it in a crude way, your ex-partner is actually enjoying the best of both world; enjoying sex and companion from his/her current partner and free sex from you; treating you as a spare tire. You are only wanted when his/ her current partner cannot satisfy his/ her needs, sexual needs. Why allow such an unfair trade? Who is the winner? You are definitely not the chosen one.
This is a democratic society, of course one can still go ahead to do what he/she deem right, something that does not goes against he/her moral values. Moral values varies from person to person but I believe there are some moral values that are the same through out the human race.
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Con Man Strikes Again
whispered @ Wednesday, October 12, 2005 by stardusz
Seldom have the habit of watching news as I would usually be happily facing my iBook, chatting up with friends or browsing through some websites. Today, for some reasons or another, I have decided to do a "good deed" to watch the news and lett my siblings surf the internet: I am the broadband hogger of the family *ha*.
News was on by the time I settled down in my parents' room (being the owners of the house, they naturally have the rights to place a TV set in their room). After about five to ten minutes, a news reported by the newscaster made my blood boiled. It goes something like this:
"An old lady in her late 80s was conned by a man who claimed to be an employee of the SP and is there to check on her lighting facilities. While she was doing some cleaning outside her flat, the man went to her drawer, removed some $8000 cash and jewellery that worth over a thousand dollars"
As this was being read out, an old lady, wrinkled and hair in snowy white appeared on the screen. Though I could not see her crying nor did not understand her dialect, I could felt the sorrow and bitterness in her speech and she is not the first old folk to be conned. Before her, there were another two old folks being conned by similar tactic.
Seriously, I really cannot understand what is wrong with some of the young people nowadays. It is not that they are physically disabled or mentally unsound (to be mentally unsound is totally impossible in this case as it is a swindler we are talking about now) when there are proper jobs around, why resort to swindling? And, why of all age groups, do they picked on the old and weak ones? Where have all the moral education gone to? Swept away and got lost in the Ocean of Greed? These old folks are the ones who help in the building of Singapore to what she is today. Most of them are uneducated due to though living environment they lived in when they were younger. They have to scrimp and save for decades before they can save up to a 4-figure sum; an amount that we can save up easily within 2-3 year time.
I really hope that the police will nab this bugger, make sure him cough out the amount he had swindled from these old folks and throw him to jail. Allowing him enjoy the taste of rotan will be a bonus in my point of view.
I have heard rumours on how cellmates sodomize a rapist when one was thrown to jail so that the rapist gets a chance to have a taste of his own medicine and the cellmates are able to release his sexual needs. I wonder if any swindler especially those who swindled old folks money will received similar treatments should he be caught and sent behind bars. Need not necessary be sodomizing him, a good trashing will do the job
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The Swelling on Her Face
whispered @ Monday, October 10, 2005 by stardusz
This is a true-life incident (names had been changed):
I have been tutoring the bubbly Amanda for almost one and a half years. During tuition, Amanda would talk or sing non-stop, despite my 'warning' to make her write 500 lines of "I will not talk during tuition." At times, Amanda will be very restless, cannot sit still and gave me a sulky attitude, other then that, Amanda is a pretty fine and intelligent girl that I have ever came across.
Today, I arrived at Amanda's home for tuition at exactly 6pm. Amanda greeted me with a smile but there was a tint of sadness within her eyes. During tuition, Amanda was unusually quiet and solemn. I have noticed her unusual behaviour and some swelling on Amanda's face but I kept quiet about it.
After doing some English exercises that I told her to do, Amanda opened up to me and told me that her mother had slapped her repeatedly on her face today as she had accidentally drop a piece of jade jewellery. However, according to Amanda, that piece of jade is ok, no chipped, no cracked, no nothing, still she was slapped repeatedly because her mother was in a bad mood.
Amanda then continued, "But it's okay, my mum beats me up ocassionally when she is in a bad mood. Sometimes she even use a belt to whip me. My mum is very hot tempered and gets angry easily..." already I could see tears brimming around her eyes as she said these to me.
My heart goes out to her and felt sorry for the girl. It seems that Amanda has gotten used to the beating and treat it like parts and parcels of her life.
"Amanda, does your parents beat you often?" I asked. She nodded, then shaked her head and said, "well, sometimes I deserved the beatings as I was naughty. My dad use cane on me, but mummy will use belt or whatever that she can grab hold of..." by then, tears were flowing down her chubby cheek.
I nodded, gave Amanda the best smile I can put up and patted on her shoulder. I tried my best to contain the outburst that was growing within me then; anger surged after hearing what Amanda told me.
"Do you have anyone to talk to? Like you cousins or aunties or uncles?" I asked. She told me she has a cousin whom she often go to church with but that's about it, they don't really talk a lot.
At this point of time, I assumed she told me all these because she has no one to speak to at home as she is the only child of the family. She told me she had run away from home once (just walk around her condominum) after her mother beat her, I warned her not to do it again as it is dangerous for a young girl to wander about alone. I also told her to call me when she should feel sad and need someone to speak to next time. I felt that listening to her is the least I can do for her now.
~End of entry~
I really do not understand how can a mother do this to her own child, just grab anything within her reach and start beating her up? One thing I did not mention is that, after the girl was beaten up, her mother would call her school up to apply a day leave for her. This, according to her, is to save her from embarrassment.
But I see it differently, I suspect that the reason why her mother apply leave for her is to save herself from being probed by the girl's school teachers. How to explain when the teacher or her classmates ask her how come she had a swell here or there? Being a child, it is easy for the teacher to see through a lie, if she is lying about her wounds.
This remind me the swelling I saw on the maid they have engaged previously. I went for the tuition after work and was surprised to see a bruise on my student's maid's cheek when she came out to open the door for me. Upon seeing her face, I suspected that something amiss. I asked her what happened to her face and she said she had an accident the day before and hit her cheek while she slipped in the kitchen. I accepted the excuse she made with a doubtful mind; her body language was telling me that otherwise. She left her employers a few days after that and I heard from my student that her maid left before the contract ends (in less then a month time) because her mother had pass away and she wanted to go back to her hometown for the funeral...
Or was it? I have no idea at all...
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